New Year's Eve Party
by passing on the pixy dust
Summary: end! the damn thing finally finished, 9 months late....oi vey! it's a yu-gi-oh & Gundum wing crossover. it's my party, beware! (pg-13 for swearing, drinking and pranks etc..) other charcters welcome!
1. weclome to my party!

Disclaimer-I don't own any characters in this fic except for Kinta, and myself, everyone else is owned by their respective company, or individual (some characters are originals)

_*_*_

Hello all! I am here it's my New Years Eve party! First let me introduce you to my friend and co-host for the purpose of this fic his name will be….um I'll give him a name later! Just so ya know, I'm Kilandra, your hostess!

No Name Boy-Why don't I get a name but you do?!

Kilandra-Because I'm having a mental block,… anyway.. he is a friend of mine, he will aid me in controlling my guests this evening, it is now 7:00, and we have 5 hours til midnight! And our first guests have arrived!

In walks, Tea, Relena and Tristin

Kil-What the hell I didn't invite you?!

Tea-We're here to tell you to that everyone is coming late.

Kil-Oh. Um yeah well, you three can go over by the punch bowl til they get here 

(in unison)-OK!

_*_*_

Kil-God they are idiots…

NNB-You deserve it.

Kil-Hey, watch it you don't even have a name yet! and I have author powers for once!

NNB-You had them in another fic you dolt.

Kil-Shut up!

NNB-You do know you still wearing your painting clothes from today right?

Kil-Ack! I am I need to change! WARDROBE!

 *There is a hurricane of cloths and makeup*

Kil-Ta da! I'm ready!

No Name Boy is rolling on the floor in hysterics

Kil-WHAT?!, ahhh! I… I…I look like …

NNB-A hooker. you look ridiculous,

Kil-Shut up. WARDROBE!

*ANOTHER HURRICANE of clothes.*

Kil-How's this?

NNB-Um, look at yourself

Kil-Not a dress, not a dress! WARDROBE!

*Yet another hurricane of clothes..*

Kil-There, I look fine now. Jeans and a tank top I'm happy.

NNB-Hey you got taller!

Kil-*shows him the 3-inch heels* hey I'm short, I need them.

NNB-You're. Taller. Than. Me. Normally.

Kil-So what? deal with it. Well we have time to waste before anyone important comes.

NNB-Give me a name damn it.

Kil-Hobo bob.

NNB-?_? NO!

Kil-Idiot?

NNB-Ha ha not funny.

Kil-Herman?

NNB-What the hell?!

Kil-Kiwi?

NNB-I am not a fruit. -_-;

Kil-Cricket?

NNB-You are crazy.

Kil-How 'bout I just call you Z?

NNB-Oh so I have been reduced to a letter, don't I feel loved…

Kil-How 'bout  Pepsi?

NNB-Are you on drugs?

Kil-No. ah I know!

NNB-I am afraid..

Kil-your name will be Fuma!

NNB-*sweatdrop* That's from X and he was evil and besides I think you spelled it wrong.

Kil-So? O.o

NNB-NOT FUMA!

Kil-Fine, hmm this is getting hard I can't think of guy's names….. can I just call you No Name Boy? I like that.

NNB-For now but I need a name before the end of chapter two. And how can you not think of a decent name for me? You've made up at least 15 for stories, it can't be that hard!

Kil-okay, name by the end of chapter two,  Deal! And I am having a mental block at the moment, I have ideas but you would hate them all.

NNB-I don't doubt that…

_*_*_

NNB-What time is it?

Kil-Like 7:30,

NNB-Ug. So who did you invite anyway?

Kil-Well, Yami, Bakura, Kaiba, Yugi, Ryou, Malik, Heero, Duo, Trowa, Quatre…

NNB-Um, Kilandra, did you invite anyone I like or just the anime guys you think are bishounen?

Kil-And I invited Anthy, Lyna, Katherine, Azara, and Kinta. 

NNB-They don't count! And besides, Kinta's worse than you! 

Kil-Well you're in for a long night then 

NNB(-_-;;)- have I ever told you I hate you?

Kil-Yes, now shut up.

NNB-Not a chance.

_*_*_

 in walk:

 Seto Kaiba, Yami, Bakura, Malik, Heero, Duo, Trowa, Quatre, Lyna, Anthy, and Kinta

Kil-Yay! Guests I like!

NNB-Oh 'fun' Torture time-_-;;;

Kil-Well you can stay here then, I'm going to talk!

_*_*_*_

Kil-Lyna you made it!

L-Yeah, nice guests but, where's Wufei?

Kil-I shot him

L-Fun

Kil-It was. Where's Anthy?

*Points to dance floor, Anthy and Yami are dancing.*

Kil-Ahh. Talk to ya later, have fun!

L-I will!

_*_*_

Kil-Kinta?

Kinta-What?

Kil-You are not allowed to kill anyone tonight, *eyes Kinta trench coat* drop the weapons, you too Bakura and Malik!

 *The three reluctantly drop all their weapons and the is now a large heap on the floor.*

Kil-Wow that's more than I guessed…. Well they can go in the closet for now.

Let's go dance!

 _*_*_

(on the dance floor.)

Duo-Kilandra?

Kil-What?

Duo-Are there any more girls coming?

Kil-Yeah soon!

Duo-Good! You have twice as many guys here!

Kil-I know, usually at dances there are twice as many girls I'm sick of it, and besides I don't like that many anime girls, on that thought…HEERO!

H-What?

Kil-I have a mission for you.

H-Mission? O.o

Kil-Yes, go kill Relena; she's over by the punch bowl with Tristen and Tea.

H-Mission accepted!*Heero pulls his gun, cocks it and rushes off to fulfill his mission.*

Kinta-Why does he get weapons but we don't?

Kil-Kinta you are my homicidal darkness no way in hell am I going to have you, Bakura _and_ Malik together at a party _with_ your weapons! I'd rather die first! In fact I would die if I let you!

K-I hate you.

Kil-The feeling's mutual.

_*_*_

everyone is having fun dancing, this includes No Name Boy b/c he likes to dance, this doesn't include Relena( who should be dead by now) or Heero (b/c he's killing Relena or disposing of the body.) also Tea and Tristen have joined the group.

_*_*_

Malik, (whispering)-Kinta?

Kinta-What?

M-Want to have a little fun, I still have the millennium rod..

Kinta-Oh! Who first?

M-How 'bout the pharaoh?

Kinta-Sounds great to me. Hey Bakura watch this, how 'bout we make the pharaoh the lord of the dance?

*The rod glows and Yami begins to Riverdance!*(if you have never seen Riverdance you are blessed, basically it's **_really_** annoying Irish dancing)

A-Yami what the hell are you doing?

Yami-(Monotonously) I'm dancing Anthy. 

Everyone realizes that Yami is Riverdancing and is now staring at him

Mind controlled Yami is clueless and just keeps dancing,

A-Malik! Are you doing this?

Anthy notices Malik, Bakura and Kinta in a group and everyone knows that is never good.

M-Crap we've been found out! 

The three begin to back away from Anthy as she stalks towards them sparks jumping from her hands.

Kil-Cut it out you four, Malik release Yami and Anthy don't fry them.

A-Really? I think I'd be doing the world a service if I did.

Kil-I tend to agree but I don't have room for the bodies.

A-Fine fine…

*Yami falls on the floor after being released* what the hell was that?

*everyone points to the three*

Y-die. 

Kil-I said no killing unless I tell you to!

Everyone was disappointed, well except maybe Malik, Kinta, and Bakura, and returned to their dancing.

_*_*_

The clock struck eight, 

Kil-Aww only four more hours, 

NNB-Um Kilandra 4 hours is a looooooong time.

Kil-Not for me! ^_^

*Group anime fall*

_*_*_*_*_*_

So now it's eight, time for chapter one to end.

So first off, review or I will use the weapons I confiscated from Bakura, Kinta, and Malik to kill you. 

Oh and I am willing to take in a few random reviewers! Also you can suggest anime characters to come, I'm open for ideas. I have a list but hey, the more the better!

And contest! Name No Name Boy! He needs a name! Whatever name I like will get used and you will be added to the party.


	2. 8:00 and a name for No Name Boy

Kil-Welcome back everyone! It's now eight 'o clock at my party only four hours until midnight!

NNB-what happens at midnight?

Kil-I turn 15!

NNB-so this was just a big precursor to your birthday?

Kil-Yeah, and I wanted a humor fic.

NNB-whatever...do I have a name yet?

Kil-YES! You do!

NNB-oh crap, who chose it?

Kil-Anthy did!

NNB-Anthy?

Kil-Yes.

NNB- I'll kill her if it's bad…

Kil-everyone gather 'round...oh wait we can't annonce your name until everyone comes!

Anthy-whose not here? 

Kil-Katherine, Azara, Yugi, Ryou, Ryooji Otagi, Joey, and anyone else I forgot.

An-are they going to be here soon?

Kil-, in 5,4, 3, 2, 1,..

Katherine-hey everyone we're here!

Kil-Katherine just in time we're naming No Name Boy here.

Ka-fun 

Kil-alright, listen! No Name Boy has a name now. A thanks to Anthy. And without further ado I wish to announce No Name Boy's name is, *Duo pulls out a toy drum and does a drum roll*…Fuuma!

Fuuma groans, - I don't want to be Fuuma!

To bad to late you are Fuuma! And Duo you can quit with the drum now.

Duo-sorry. *Puts drum away*

Fu-I do not want to be called Fuuma!

Kil-*gets a particularly evil look in her eye.*hey, Kinta, Bakura and Malik, you have a little job, make Fuuma like his name.

Kin-may we..?

Kil-yeah you can have access to your weapons, *points* use that room over there it has tile floor easier clean up if there's any blood..

Fu-I LIKE MY NAME! I'LL KEEP IT! DON'T LET THOSE PSYCHOPATHS NEAR ME!

Kil-ha thought so. Guess no fun for you three.

Kin-damn…

Kil-well I guess back to the party now..

The crowd of guests migrates to the dance floor once more because um…I said so? Yeah because I said so that's why. 

Well, the party continues and some of our guests have gotten into a very interesting conversation…

Trowa-oh I never use theirs

Yugi-really? They're great I tell you!

Duo-neither get the job done for me, I mean during a battle it makes all the difference!

Heero-what are you all talking about? weapons?

Yugi-hair products! If your hairs in your face how are you supposed to duel?

Heero-oh! Now for me it's..

And so the great hair care debate went on soon the conversation included not only Heero, Trowa, Duo and Yugi but Yami, Ryooji, Malik, Bakura, Tristen, Ryou… well lets just say all the guys at the party except Quatre (he doesn't use gel, or anything; it's natural!) and Fuuma (for some reason Fuuma did not want to talk about hair probably because all his can do is bounce when he walks..

Fu-hey!

Kil-but it's true!)

The argument turned into a rather amusing brawl, sadly I lost ten bucks to Kinta, because Yugi successfully gave Kaiba a black eye, wow I had no idea the little guy even knew how to hit… after a while though everyone was up and healed (how this happened you ask? How the hell am I supposed to know I'm just the hostess!)

And!

Here are the results of the 20-minute debate-

Best shampoo-Shauve

Best conditioner-Herbal Essences

Best gel-Bed-head

Best dye(yes it's true, some of them use dye!)-Feria (anyone else scared yet?)

Well  after the 'great hair care' debate (and brawl) everyone returned to dancing and talking. Now I'll let you decide if that was a good thing or not…

*on the dance floor* 

Duo and Joey are break dancing, um, I hope they don't kill someone, let's avoid those two for the time being….

Elsewhere..

Most people are acting normal (surprisingly) but of course how could Bakura, Malik, and Kinta go this long without some prank or bloodshed? 

Kil-what are you three doing?

Malik-something that doesn't concern you!

Kil-like hell! It's my party what are you three doing? Tell me **now**

Kinta-don't feel like it…

Kil-hey Fuuma come over here and help me deal with these three..

Fu-why should I help you?

Kil-because, I said so damn it!

Fu-that is not a reason!

Kil-yes it is!

Fu-I'm staying here and there's nothing you can do about it!

Kil-oh really?

*during the argument*

Kinta-okay now!

*Malik and Bakura empty the contents of two bottles into the punch bowl*

Kinta-heh, give it 20 minutes and this will become one very amusing party..

_*_

Kil-Will!

Fu-Won't!

Kil-Fine! I'll get Yami and Anthy then! *mumbling* I hate him I hate him I hate him…, oh what, oh crap they split, I'll have to beat Fuuma later, oh well hopefully no one's dead… ah who cares, where's Katherine..

Katherine-I'm right over here, are you blind or something?

Kil-why does everyone like to criticize me!

Ka-because it's fun and …I decree it!

Kil-well I decree that …….Trowa's hair be blue! *Trowa's hair magically becomes blue* hee hee hee it time for some fun with author powers!

Ka-I decree that …..Kaiba  must dance disco! *it happens*

Kil-I decree that Heero must fully smile! *he does*

Ka-oh my god that was amazing, he smiled! It's a first!

Kil-I got the power!(starts singing from Labyrinth) The girl with the power! The power of voodoo, who do? you do!

Ka- I decree you stop.

Kil- don't worry that's all I remember, I haven't watched it in awhile.

Ka-good

Kil-I decree that Tristen's hair be unpointy! *it flops down and becomes like normal hair!*

Ka-another miracle! I decree that Kinta wear a dress. *Kinta the evil bitch of the west, finds herself in a pink frilly dress.*

Kinta-turn me back or I will rip your throats out! *they turn her back reluctantly*

Kil(rotflmao)- oh that was amusing, we could have died; but amusing,  how 'bout this? I decree that Fuuma must..mpm!*this is do to the fact Fuuma ran up and  covered my mouth before I could say anything* 

Fu-leave me out of it! If you two decree anything about me I will personally kill you both.

Kil-but what if we decreed you couldn't hurt anyone or that you are a duck?

Fu-I'd find a way,

Kil-how about I grant you with the secret of author powers temporarily than we're all even.

Fu*considers* deal.

*I give him author powers*

(telepathically from Kilandra to Katherine) /I gave him powers, but of course we can reverse anything he does! He is beneath us!/

/good! What were you going to do to him anyway?/

/*mentally laughing like a manic* well….actually  I was going just to make him unable to lie or say anything mean, it would have annoyed him to death../

/it probably would have, you two can't be around each other for more than five minutes without getting into a fight!/

 Fuuma (who is oblivious to the telepathic conversation going on..)-lets see, I decree that…*gets and extremely evil glint in his eyes* …Kilandra must admit she's infioror to me! *nothing happens* what?! Why didn't it work?!

Ka-because I blocked it dummy! You can't do anything to us! We can cancel your decrees!

Fu-I hate you both.

Kil&Ka (in unison)- thank you for noticing!!! *they laugh hysterically*

_*_*_back to evil ones.._*_*_

Kinta- we need to do something, the punch should be taking affect soon. And that dress thing *shivers* I want payback..

Malik-what do you think, like start some truth or dare or a round of I never?

K-exactly! With everyone drunk it will be so wonderful, but first, Bakura can you get the champagne glasses form the kitchen, I have an idea..

_*_*_

Kinta – attention everyone! *people look* please take a glass of punch and raise it up in a toast! *everyone does so because what else would they do…* I propose that…

Kil(whispering)- I think she's up to something, *sniffs punch* yeah she did something to it. Don't drink it. But pretend you did, we'll play along with this for a while..

Ka-shouldn't we warn everyone one else or at least Fuuma? or Anthy?

Kil-no he tried to mess with me he deserves what he gets.

Ka-revengeful enough?

Kil- but your right I should tell Anthy, *looks and sees it's to late Anthy drank hers* damn it, here dump it in the plant. *they do*

Ka-I just thought of something, there wasn't a plant there before, were did it come from?

Kil-you always pour suspicious drinks in plants it's a rule! There had to be a plant!

Ka- ok whatever…

_*_*_

Duo (of his own free will)- hey who wants to play some 'I never'?

Kinta- oh my Ra he's doing our work for us wonderful!

Everyone gathers round because they have nothing better to do, it's a big circle, so let's vanish some people away…. Much better now the circle consists of, Yami & Anthy, Duo, Trowa, Quatre, Heero, Katherine, myself (like I'd miss this), Kinta, Bakura, Malik, Seto,  Fuuma, Yugi, Ryou, Tea, Joey, and Tristen, um yeah that should be it… opps that's still a lot, OH WELL!

_*_*_

AND THE CLOCK STRIKES 9:00!

_*_*_ 

ha all over for the moment, so I, opps um I mean  KINTA has succeeded in getting everyone but Katherine and myself drunk. And now drunk Duo has suggested playing 'I never'!

*NOTE*- for anyone who doesn't know 'I never' is a drinking game where you say I never blank and anyone who has done what you haven't must drink,

Example:

Someone says-I never have failed a paper.

So if you have ever failed a paper you drink, the whole point is to get people to confess to things they've done while getting extremely drunk.

 If your of legal age you play til everyone is passed out drunk and the person left wins, but for us minors you can play it with extremely sugary soda (you give everyone two cans) and when you have drunk all of you two cans you lose. But since this is a fanfic and legal drinking ages don't matter (plus everyone's already had some) this will be played with real stuff. 

And in the next chapter I have three special 'guests' appear,- oh Fuuma! Torture time!


	3. i never'9:00

Hee hee hee, it's nine o'clock and time for drunken fun! Read on if you dare!

Disclaimer-I don't own yu-gi-oh or gundum wing if I did gundum wing would be on everyday and Malik's dub name would not be Terrance! And Isis's would not be Ishizhou! Grr!

_*_*_

(Remember we're playing 'I never' right now)

Kilandra-so who what's to go first?

Duo-I will! Okay..I have never gotten up earlier than 7:00 am,

Kilandra-ok lame but grr. *drinks, so does everyone else but Joey*

Seto-I'll go, I've never worn a dog suit *smirks at Joey who drinks*

Joey-damn you ya rich bastard.   

Duo-heh, my turn, I've never, *looks around evilly* taken the wrapper off a starburst using only my teeth and tongue.

Kil-oh fuck you Duo, *drinks*

Everyone stares at her. No one notices Malik drink.

Kil-what! You mean none of you have ever done that? It's pretty normal in grade school and parties.  *everyone shakes heads they see m confused* oh fine even though I know that at least one of you has to be lying..*puts head in hand* just someone go. And Duo stop spying on me!

Katherine-I'll go next…I've never lost a game of duel monsters.

Yami-that was evil

Seto-you've got to be kidding..

Ka-nope.

*All duelists exchange glances then jump to attack Katherine. They hit a translucent bubble that has appeared around Katherine.*

Bakura-what the fuck was that!

Kilandra-that was me, no killing my sub authoress I need someone sane here!

Fuuma-what about me?

Kil-*ignores him* just drink you all, *they do * 

Kinta-haven't you ever lost a duel?

Kil-nah, don't play much on that thought Katherine here has never played, that's why she can say she's never lost. Now it's my turn  I've never killed anyone.

Kinta, Bakura, Malik, Anthy and the gundum pilots drink.

Yami-um do mind crushes count?

Kil-no. so who's next?

Fuu-I'll go , I've never said 'in accordance with prophecy' til now.

Katherine and Kilandra exchange a look; drink; then speak. Yami, Seto, and Anthy also drink.

Kil-um you're dead

Ka-that was just plain annoying

Kil-you thinking what I am?

Ka-shadow realm?

Kil-shadow realm. 

A dark portal to the shadow realm appears and they push Fuuma in.

Kil-bye baka yarro!

Ka-see you when we feel like it!

And the portal closed.

Kinta-who else didn't really understand that? *everyone makes some sign that they too are confused*

Kil-I'll explain, he knows that Katherine and I  say that. You see he was doing it just to get us drunk and henceforth must pay.

Kinta-and so you two sent him to the shadow realm?

Kil-exactly!

Yugi-isn't that a little mean?

Kil-you know K he's right.

Ka-so how 'bout we send some company?

Kil-perfect! ***snaps, Shadii and Mokuba appear, and a deck of cards* you two take the cards and off you go! *shove them though another portal looking very confused***

Seto-WHY DID YOU SEND MOKUBA TO THE SHADOW REALM!

Kil-um because…Katherine help reason?

Ka-because…hey why do I have to think of why you're the leading debatist and BS artist!

Kil-oh fine, we sent him because we couldn't have him here because there is alcohol and that would be a bad influence on him…*crosses her fingers and waits for a reaction* 

Seto-your insane! I've lost Mokuba forever! *Seto gets up and starts freaking out and running around* 

Kil-um wow that was interesting, I think we're going to end this before anyone else goes insane..

Kinta-but no one passed out!

Kil-um yeah people did. *everyone realizes that Tea Tristen Yugi Quatre, and Ryou are out.*

Kinta-oh wow they can't handle drinks now can they? Whad' they have like one each?

***Bakura begins poking Ryou repeatedly*******

Kinta-whoa, you're drunk Bakura, you were not supposed to drink that extra bottle I gave you nitwit..

Bakura*giggles*

Kin-I'm so scared *walks away to find Malik.*

_*_*in the shadow realm*_*_

Fuuma-um hi.

Shadii-hi.

Mokuba-hi.

*the three stare at each other for awhile then Fuuma notices the cards*

Fuu(with evil look in eyes)-you two ever played poker? *they both shake their heads* perfect, boys get out your valuables we're playin poker..

_*_*at the party*_*_

well we've lost quite a few actually let's  recap-

Fuuma-shadow realm cheating Mokuba and Shadii out of anything and everything they own.

Seto-running around crazy because he's drunk and believes he lost Mokuba forever, oh wait, now he's moping and crying in a corner.

Yugi, Ryou,  Tea, Tristen, Quatre-all out drunk.

Bakura-is extremely drunk is poking Ryou repeatedly and giggling..?_?

Azara, Lyna, Ryooji -they went poof! They gone now…

Relena-dead and buried more cause for party!

So who's still here?

Yami, Anthy, Kinta, Malik, Kilandra, Katherine,  Joey,  Heero, Duo, and Trowa, oh wow we really cut down, cool. 

Anthy-so what do we do now?

Kil- I was going to torture Fuuma but he's gone now so I don't know…

Ka-I vote we sit and relax after al that drinking…

Kil-defiantly not a bad idea oh wait I know! *snaps fingers* there we're all somber again, author powers are fun!

Yami- but they're all still fainted.

Kil-it'll where off in a few minutes.

Yami-ah.

Anthy- again I ask what do we do now?

Kil- I'm thinking some people torture, we need to get Fuuma back here.

Ka-so soon

Kil-yeah I have a few guests arriving soon.

Ka-who?

Kil- I'm am forever silent.

Ka-you have to tell me!

Kil-oh fine *** whispers***

Ka- oh I can't wait. Let's get him back here.

*they snap a shadow realm portal appears and  the three step out, Fuuma carrying a large pile of cash and jewels.*

Kil- hand it over you're not keeping that.

Fu-*grumbles under breath, but the words bitch and Kisama can be heard* take it.

Kil-thanks I'm low on cash.

Shady-aren't you giving it back to us?!

Kil- no. obviously you don't know me that well. You two can leave now *snaps*

Ka- I just realized something why are snapping for our author powers? We originally decreed things.

Kil- snaps are faster, decrees are for grandeur and intimidation.

Ka- ah. So can we torture Fuuma now?

Fu- no one's torturing me!

Kil-you don't have a say in this, sorry. *doorbell rings* ahh they're here! ***opens the door to reveal- Buffy the Vampire Slayer???*Um your in the wrong fanfic, you're not supposed to be here.**

Buffy- *looks around* um yeah,  sorry 'bout that. *leaves*

Kil- okay weird,  *doorbell rings* that must be them. *and it is- Inuyasha???* ahh! Why can't you people find the right fanfics! Shoo! You weren't invited! *kicks him out and slams the door*

Anthy- why were you so mean to him?

Kil- because the last Inuyasha episode I saw  'go back to your own time Kagomi' and he was mean and evil. *pouts* *doorbell rings* this had better be them…. * behind the door is… a pikachu*

 Pikachu! You where supposed to bring him! why didn't you!?

Pika- pika pika! Chu! Pi-chu!

Kil-oh, well go get them! Shoo! 

Pika- pi -KA!*runs off*

Ka- since when do you speak pikachu? *voices the wonderings of the whole group*

Kil- I went though a phase in fifth grade, and besides my little brother you forgot about him. he's still nicely obsessed. 

Ka- ah

*ding! ding*

Kil- it's the door!

Fu- um Kilandra that's the clock *points* it's 10:00

Kil-oh.

_*_*_

and thus endth the chapter!

And dang it I was going to torture Fuuma!

Fu- ha ha! I have evaded the evil plot!

Kil- you have not, I have two more chapters and people coming!

Fu- and uh, what was with the pikachu?

 Kil- you'll find out soon enough, here's a word of warning- 5th grade recess..

Fu- you wouldn't !  I thought that was just a joke!

Kil- I don't joke about those things.

Fu- oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck! Nooooo!!!!!!!!! *runs off*

Kil- ha, I win as usual, 

Stay tuned for the next chapter! Who is the 'special' guest of Kilandra's? will everyone wake up from being drunk? Will Bakura stop poking Ryou?  All this and more in the fourth chapter!

*and*

does anyone want to join the party? Anyone? Write a little about yourself in a review or e-mail and you will join the party! We have two hours left, the night is still young!


	4. 10:00 guests, the YPA and a pregnancy sc...

Disclaimer-I don't own yu-gi-oh or gundum wing, I also don't own thorn and briar rose, I don't own Anthy or Katherine, if I own Fuuma or not is debatable.

_*_*_

*ding-dong*

Kilandra- the door the door! Who is it this time.. *opens door* yay! C'mon in! everyone meet the new guests, thorn and briar rose!

Briar rose-hi! Oh and I told you- not responsible for her *jerks thumb at thorn* anything destroyed or mauled, not my problem

Kilandra- don't worry.  Completely understandable. And you came just in time, everyone should be waking up now, *Yugi, Ryou tea Tristen Quatre all wake up*

Thorn- Quatre! *glomps him*

Quatre-uh help…?  Guys…?

Thorn*struggling against other three gundum pilots pulling her away*-but! But! My Quatre-chan! *whimper*

Kilandra-guys leave her be, I mean do you want another Kinta or Malik here?

*everyone in rooms shakes head then steps back from thorn, except for Kinta and Malik, who step forward.*

Kinta-hey thorn I think we have an offer to make… *** pulls her away***

Kilandra*yelling at three walking away*- don't kill things! No bombs or I swear I will kill you1 got it?!

Grr.. stupid yamis…

Yami -hey!

Kil-oh sorry Yami, you know what I meant.

Ryou- Kilandra! Get Bakura away! *everyone realizes drunk Bakura is still poking Ryou*

Kilandra-oh, heh heh heh, sorry you're stuck with him.

Ryou-but Kil! Won't you use your author powers please? *bats eyes* 

Kil-I'm not going to give in, you're stuck with your yami, at least this way he isn't trying to kill things with Malik, Kinta, and Thorn…

Ryou-okay true point, but he's really annoying! Get away Bakura!

Bakura- *pokes Ryou some more and giggles like a three year old.*

Ryou-why me…?

Yami –SHE'S CUTTING OFF THE CIRCULATION IN MY ARM!

*Everyone turns to Yami where Anthy is attached to his arm.*

Kil-what's with Anthy..? hey Anthy get off Yami you're hurting you're boy! *walks forward the leaps back as Anthy lunges forward at her, (note she is holding onto Yami the whole time**)* Ahhh! She bit me!**

Anthy- damn right. *hiss* *glomps Yami tighter*

Yami-help  please!

Anthy-MINE!

Joey- did she have sugar?

Yami-no….

Seto-did see watch X today?

Yami-no…

Seto& Joey-give her sugar!

Kilandra- first of all how do you two know this, and second do you really want to get within a five foot radius of her, I mean she hasn't even started using her nails or powers yet and she still drew blood! *holds out bleeding arm as proof*

Everyone in room *shakes heads*

Kil-whose immortal around here? Hey Duo you're the god of death!

Duo-not a chance, I ain't getting near her…

Kil-Heero?

Heero-mission accepted.

Kil * whispering to everyone else* -he's going down, not even the perfect solider can do this…

Heero walks forward with a piece of chocolate in his hand instead of his gun, when Anthy lungs he grabs her and shoves the chocolate in her mouth. Anthy chews and instantly becomes normal, Yami who has been let go of runs upstairs, (since when are there stairs you ask? Since  I SAID SO!) 

Anthy runs after him a moment later. 

Kil- well their gone now, um.. back to the party!

_*_*_

Anthy-Yami wait!

Yami-are you ok?

Anthy-*nods*

Yami- good, lets go back then,

They start to walk out of the room, when Yami tripped on a ….marble? He started to fall backwards; Anthy leaned forward to grab him but also fell forward, the two landed on top of each other on the floor, blushing immensely…

_*_*_ 

Kil-hey duo, go check on Yami and Anthy!

Duo-ok! *Bounces up the stairs*

_*_*_

Duo walks into room with Yami and Anthy-the two still on the floor…

Duo-am I interrupting something, ***smirks*******

Anthy *blushes redder if that's possible*- um…a……uh… just don't say ANYTHING okay?

Duo-got it *leaves*

Anthy- maybe we should…

Yami-um yeah, let's go…

*They get up*

_*_*_

*Anthy and Yami come walking downstairs*

Yugi- what where you to doing up there

Yami- um, talking.

Malik *walks up*- hey when's the baby due?

Everyone- WHAT?!

Duo- well what they were really doing upstairs…

Anthy- DUO!!! YOU ARE DEAD!

Duo-um… I didn't say anything… *tries to look innocent*

Kinta- *snickers * so, aren't so good are you two? Baby huh?

Anthy- I AM NOT PREGNANT!

Yami *thinking to himself*  / if she was I want to be the father../

Kinta* eyes bug*- Yami stop thinking….

Yami-huh? *remembers she can read minds* oh! *blushes very very very red*

Anthy-what were you thinking about….?

Yami-um…um….nothing…

Anthy-*glares*

Kilandra*distracting her so she doesn't kill Yami*-okay so you're not pregnant?

Anthy- no. *glares s'more*

Kinta-let's have her take the test!

Anthy-WHAT! *dragged off by Kinta*

_*ten minutes later*_

Kinta- she's pregnant!

Anthy- I am not!

Kinta-prove it. The test says you are.

Yami- I'm a father!

Anthy- shut up!

Yugi- huh? Does that mean…..? *faint*

Malik- so what ya gonna name it?

Anthy- I . AM. NOT. PREGNANT!!!

Kinta- the test says you are.

Anthy- well it's wrong!

Kinta- the box says 99% accurate face it you are.

Anthy- I'm the one percent!

Kinta- care to take another?

Anthy- just to prove you wrong.. *snatches box. And leaves*

Yami- I'm a father!

Everyone- congratulations!

_*_*_

Anthy returns ten minutes later…

Kinta- what does it say?

Anthy-*silent.* Yami. I'm going to kill you…

Yami-huh?

Anthy-omae o korusu…

Yami-???

Heero-means she's gonna kill you.

Anthy- not just kill-burn! Annihilate you from the face of the earth! *raises hand and is about to execute a fireball*

???- hold it right there!

Everyone-huh? *turns*

???- this is the Y.P.A.! everyone freeze!

Anthy-NOOOOO! *runs away extremely fast*

Yami*chases the mother of his unborn child* wait come back! what's the Y.P.A.?!

Anthy* is very far away but for some reason we can all hear her…* the Yami Protection Agency!!!!

Yami- I have a protection agency, why don't they ever save me in your fanfics?

Anthy-OH SHUT UP!

y.p.a. agent-well she got away, sorry for the disturbance miss, hey what's your name?

Kilandra-um, Ket…yeah..

y.p.a. agent- alright, everyone move out after Anthy!

*helicopters with swat teams and trucks and the entire army go racing after Anthy and Yami…*

everyone-*blink*

Bakura-*blink* *poke Ryou*

Kilandra- *big sigh* they didn't get me.

Katherine-what do you mean?

Kil-on the Y.P.A.'s authors to watch list….. I haven't post anything with his death in it yet but…

Katherine-okay so why's Anthy on it

Kil-first she's on the most wanted list, have you read her stories? 

Katherine- not all of them.

Kil- if you do you'll see why.

*doorbell rings*

Kil- finally! The Fuuma torture crew! Kinta bring him here!

Fuuma let me go! Oww! Kinta let go of me!

*Kilandra and Kinta shove him out the door and watch smiling.*

fuuma-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Joey- So what is happening anyway?

Kil- rabid Blastoise.

Everyone-???

Kil- he's being mauled by rabid blastoise- you know from Pokemon?

Everyone-ooooohhh.

Kil- you can let him back in now!

*Fuuma stumbles in clothes shredded and some blood, and he's soaking wet.*

Kil- I can't torture you huh?

Fuuma-die.

Kil- oh I'm not done yet…

Fuuma-oh shit…

*Doorbell rings*

Kil-who is it? *opens door*

Kamui- I'm here to kill Fuuma.

Lump in Kamui's cape- is it safe yet can we come out?

Anthy and Yami emerge from behind Kamui

Anthy- hi guys, I escaped! Kamui was coming here and he hid me!

Fuuma- um is he really here to kill me?

*clock strikes eleven*

_*_*_

bum bum BUM! It's eleven o'clock!

What will happen? 

Kilandra- Fuuma torture is fun! ^____^

Kinta- is Anthy really pregnant?

Anthy-I AM NOT!

Kil-you'll find out next time…

_*_*_

Thanks to Anthy for writing ideas…. She contributed mucho!

Go review and more will come!!!

Next time- is Anthy really pregnant? Is Bakura still poking Ryou? Will Kamui kill Fuuma? Find out next time when the party continues, there's only one more chapter before midnight, then epilogue!


	5. 1100 to midnoghit! babies, boys and wow ...

At long last, I've finished...over three months later than I intended…oh well...

_*_*_

Fuuma-is he really here to kill me?

Kamui-yes. I'm here to kill Fuuma.

Fuuma-oh shit.

Kamui-do you know where Fuuma is?

Everyone-*point*

Kamui-that's not Fuuma.

Kilandra-yes he is go on kill him, he looks like him and everything, kill him. *Nudge nudge*

Kamui-no that's not Fuuma.

Fuuma-whew, I'm safe

Kil-well, Kamui you can stay and if oh say you decide to kill him..

Fuuma-hey!

Kil-you can go right ahead.

Kamui-*nod*

Ryou-um, help.  Kil! Can you get Bakura away from me!! *Puppy eyes*

Kil-I'm not looking I'm not looking…. damn I looked…fine. *Snap*

Bakura-huh? *Walks away from Ryou. *

Ryou-THANK GOD!

Kil-um, Shadi isn't here.

Everyone-???

Kil-what? Shadi is god. … Didn't you know?

Everyone- *shakes heads*

Anthy-I knew!! 

Everyone-how…?

Anthy and Kil-*big long spiel about how Shadi is god but I'm too lazy to write it out but trust me Shadi is god, possibly fate too. You chose what ya want…*

Everyone-ooohhh….

Kinta- *is bored and tries to blow up Yami. *  Shit, why didn't that work….

Anthy-*tries to blow up Kinta…doesn't work*

Kinta & Anthy- I don't think we'll be using our powers for the next couple days…

All guys (namely, Bakura, Malik and Yami..)-Thank RA! We're free!

Joey- why can't you use your powers?

Yami-it's that time of the month isn't it?

All females-WHAT?!

Anthy-how do know about that?

Kinta-talk or die.

Yami-well, there was this fortuneteller I used to visit and every month she'd have to close her shop for a few days and when I asked why she said 'it's that time of the month' and that girls can't use their magic and powers during it.. that's how I know…

Anthy-oh.

Yami-why? …does that time of the month mean something special???

All females –YOU MEAN YOU DON'T KNOW!!

Yami-*blink* *nods meekly.*

Malik-heh heh heh, I think we need to teach him..

*Yami is whisked away by Bakura, Malik  Duo and Kamui so they can explain what 'that time of the month' means as well as how babies are made since they were pretty sure he didn't know…*

*fifteen minutes later*

Duo-..and that's how babies are made.

Malik-we're done!

Yami - @.@  *silent*

Bakura-I think we killed him. *pokes him*

Yami-*blink*

Bakura- damn, he's not dead…

Anthy-so has he been enlightened?

Malik-you could say that. *smirk*

Duo-so Anthy ya still pregnant?

Anthy- *glare* Kamui, give me your sword, Duo just because I can't use my powers doesn't mean I can't still kill you….

Duo- wow you go the mood swings already.

Anthy-*hit* wait…something's screaming in my head, be back..

Two minutes later.

Anthy-it's a..it's!  a…a. it it I *faint.*

Yugi-what is it?

Anshi appears...carring two small childeren. About two years old.

Everyone- ah!

Malik-shit…*edges away*

Kamui-*pokes Malik* stay.

Kil-are they..yours.. *gulp* …

Anshi-yes. They have my eyes. 

And it was true the kids had the same black marks as Anshi around their eyes.

Kil - so..who's the father…? If I dare even ask…

Duo-ho w many guys ya been with?

Small girl Anshi child – shut up duo!

Duo- that's a creepy child…

Anshi- uh huh, now if you want to know the father, take a look at them and here's a hint...tin stick!

Bakura-thousand brick!

Yami-shut up! It was the subber's fault!!!

Anshi-need another hint? Sennen cane.

Yugi-Malik! Malik's the father!! The boy looks like Malik!

Kinta-oh they're so cute! * hugs small child*

Anshi-watch out they bite.

Kinta-huh? Ow!!!!

Anshi- they have my teeth too. *grins and shows pointed teeth.*

Small children- daddy! *attack Malik*

Malik-get them off! Go play with uncle Yami. *shoves children toward Yami*

Children- *pounce and hug Yami*

Kinta-so what are their names?

Anshi-names? Um, they don't have names…. Um, Anubis and …uh,  Sheta… h, that's their names…

Yami- you're evil how dare you use my mothers name! You moraless bitch!

Anubis-*hits Yami* don't be mean to my mommy!

Yami-you trained them to hit people?!

Anshi-they just learned that on their own , I did teach them how to use magic…and steal..

Sheta-*runs toward Anshi* here mommy look what I got! *hands Anshi the millennium ring*

Bakura-I didn't even notice!! Ah!

Anubis- *runs forward* look what i got!* show's Heero's gun*

Heero- !

Kinta- they're good.

Anshi- they gotta be, they're mine after all.

Yami- I'm still mad you used her name, you dishonor  my mother's name-

Wufei- injustice!

Sheta- *jump* * hit* * lands on feet* meanies.

Anubis *plays with Yugi and Ryou.*

Sheta- *joins* 

Kamui- what ya playin?

Anubis- we're playing duel monsters! Wanna play! *smirk*

Yugi-I can teach you.

Kamui- sure.

Kil-okay so Anthy wasn't pregnant but Anshi was.. weird…

Anshi – I want child support!

Malik- *is about -

Anshi- don't you dare use that Sennen rod on me mister, I may have kids but I can still kick your sorry ass!

Malik- you don't need child support, hell those two could start their own crime ring what'd you need my money for?!

Anshi- because it makes you suffer, and it's fun.

Yami-sadist.

Anshi-damn straight. Fuuma get away from them you child harasser!

Fuuma I'm just watching the dual! Eep!

Anshi-get away from my son!

Fuuma- I'm not a harasser that was Pegasus!  
Anshi- Where!? 

Fuuma- well nowhere but he is… he's a harasser!

Anshi- don't' try to lie! Kamui get him!

Kamui- * goes after Fuuma with da big ole' sword*

Fuuma -*dash*

Yugi – damn, and he was winning too..

Yami- did you just say…

Yugi- damn right I did.

Kil- wow he's not so naïve I guess. Weird.

Sheta- don't' be mean to Yugi *glomps Yugi*

Kil-wow she's good at the puppy eyes fro being so evil.

Ryou- I showed her that. 

Anshi- eh, she's young she'll grow of it.

Ryou- I'm fifteen and I still pull them off.

Anshi- well you're a poof,  a nancy-boy poof.  She's not.

Sheta- damn right I ain't!

Anthy – *wakes up* I really hope  I was dreaming…shit I wasn't…

Sheta & Anubis – Aunt Anthy!! * hug Anthy*

Anthy- I feel loved.  *looks at children* so Malik's the father?

Anubis- yep that's my daddy!

Anthy- sure it wasn't Yami Malik?

Malik- no, I remember doing it.

Yami- hentai.

Malik - as if you're any better…

Yami- least I only screw one girl at a time!

Everyone- ooo….

Malik-  I bring my girls flowers.. they all actually like me.

Bakura- low blow … heh, continue.

Yami- I don't have to rely on my Sennen item to change their minds…

Anubis- they' hittin' below the belt!

Malik- least I don't spend my Saturday nights with my cards!

Everyone- oo..

Kinta- Yami's getting whooped.. ..I like.

Yami- hey least I don't' have an obsession with ice cubes.( a/n if you think we're lying we're not I have proof!)

Malik- *throws ice cubes at Yami* 

Yami- * run for cover* * trips over box of pregnancy tests* what the hell!

Kinta- oh yeah, Anthy's pregnancy tests, heh. * reads back* we were wrong, blue means not pregnant, pink means pregnant…oh shit… *dashes to bathroom*

Kil- who's the father! Who impregnated my yami!

All males- *step away* Not me!

Kil- * glares* someone's lying.. BAKURA!  It was you!!! Wasn't it!?

Bakura-…a …yeah….

Kil- I hate you more now. 

Bakura- you hate me?

Kil- with a fiery vengeance

Bakura- okay, just so we're clear.

Kinta- *emerges* I'm going to kill you. Very painfully. Very slowly..

Anshi- it's not that bad, think of my wonderful kids!

Kinta- Die. * glare*  

Kil- just wondering is there anyone else we need to know about? Who else is pregnant?

No one steps forward.

Kil- good.  

Fuuma- aaaaaaaaahhhhhh!!!!!!! *Kamui is still chasing him*

Kil- heh, kisama.. anyway…

Ryou- hey um, I'm sure everyone else is wondering too...how the hell did Anshi and Malik get together..?

Anshi- *shrug* drunk?

Malik- I was sober.

Ryou- was she?

Malik - as far as I know.

Anshi-  what about magic?  The items? I don't know..

Malik- spell maybe...I have  no clue either.

Bakura- you can't even remember? That's really sad.

Kinta- * glares at Bakura*  I hate you..

Bakura- don't kill me, think you'd be a single parent!

Kinta- who said I was actually going to have a child?

Bakura- um you're pregnant…

Kinta-no, I transferred its life, now Anthy's pregnant. 

Anthy- what!?

Kinta- yeah, you're pregnant,  you and Yami are having a baby.

Anthy- wha! HOW!!???

Kinta- magic, took my baby's life and put it in you except, it's now genetically yours and Yami's. Heh.

Anthy- * lunge* *strangle* 

Kinta- ack! * shoves Anthy off, and hides behind Bakura.* I'll make you a deal Anthy!

Anthy- which would be…?

Kinta *whisper*

Anthy- I like, go ahead.

Kinta-  *mutters a spell* heh, now guess whose pregnant?

Kil- I'm very afraid to ask…

Kinta- Heero is pregnant.

Heero- ! Nani?!

Kinta- well duo wanted a baby and now you two can have one! Have fun!

Katherine- *taps Kil on shoulder*

Kil- What?

Katherine- um, * points to clock*

Kil- omg! It's almost midnight! It's 11:54! Wow time went all fast and stuff… Attention!! Hey it's almost midnight we have six no five minutes left. DO YOU HEAR THAT! THE STORY IS FINALLY ENDING!!!

* fourth wall shatters.* * glass flies everywhere, random characters run and hide.*

Kil- …I thought that wasn't supposed to happen in humor fics.  That's a big mess to clean up….

* clock striking midnight!!*

Everyone- Happy New Year!!!

Bakura- yeah too bad it's currently September….Kilandra you suck at timing.

Kilandra- yeah shut up. * tosses a broom at him* for that you get to clean this up.

Bakura- hell no.

Fuuma- * still being chased by Kamui and his sword.* AAHHH help me!!!!

Everyone pauses to watch, Fuuma trips on a random marble…that looks very similar to the one Anthy and Yami had a problem with earlier….Kamui proceeds to…* censored!!!!* ..and Fuuma is now a bloody corpse.

Kil- heh. Finally. * rings a noisemaker* now it's  a happy new year.  and the end!!!

_*_*_

wait wait wait! I have the epilogue ( very short and amusing. ) to post yet. Come back! 


	6. epilogue

The epilogue….

What happened to the cast-

Fuuma- though dead is ghost took to haunting Kilandra and she proceeded to bring him back to life because he was pissing her off. Once alive…he pissed her off some more…

Heero and duo- had a bouncing baby boy. His name's Jonathon Solo Maxwell-Yuy. 

Anthy- did eventually become pregnant with Yami's child, of course they were married by then, much to Kinta's annoyance.

Kinta-she terrorized things, managed to not get pregnant again through the aids of magic, we're glad. She should never have children.

Bakura, joined Kinta in terrorizing things. Also was forced to clean up the broken fourth wall. We laughed at him as he did.

Everyone else- lived normal lives to the best of their anime character abilities, oh and yes Relena is dead forever. She didn't come back. Bitch.

Kilandra- finally finished this fanfic 9 months after she said she would. Went on to write better fanfics and never tortured the poor readers with bad fics like this  again.

The End!!


End file.
